Path: Welcome > FAQs > How to handle an INTJ

How to handle an INTJ

Here's a concise guide (mostly based on decades of personal observation:-)) on how to survive first contact with an INTJ. Don't take it too seriously but ignore it at your own peril (not a bad disclaimer, he, he).

1. Expect debate. INTJs love to tear things apart to prove (or disprove) their worthiness.
2. They will gladly argue a point they don't actually support, just for the sake of argument or to probe things. This bears repeating: an INTJ can easily assume a point of view which is contrary to his conviction. If in doubt, ask.
3. Don't expect an INTJ to respect anything you say just because you say it. INTJs bow to one authority only: rationality.
4. A statement you can't back up with either solid facts or solid reasoning will at best be ignored and at worst poked fun at in ways not many people would describe as nice.
5. For an INTJ truth is more important than simply being right. They readily admit errors or mistakes (once they have been convinced something they said or did was indeed wrong – to convice them may not be easy though) and they expect others to work likewise.
6. Stick to a statement after being proven wrong and they will treat you as an irrational idiot and everything you say as probable nonsense.
7. Try not to be repetitive. It bores them to death.
8. Don't be surprised at sarcasm. In fact, a non-sarcastic INTJ must be severely ill.
9. You can't trust that an INTJ takes something, anything for granted. Oh, they do take things for granted, but you'll never know what and what not. The more extreme ones are actually willing to put everything to the test (and I mean everything).
10. Remember that INTJs believe in workable solutions. They are open-minded to all and every possibility, but they will quickly discard any concept they deem unfeasible.
11. Their way of showing that something you say (an idea, a suggestion) has potential is by trying to pull it apart. This horrifies people who expect oohs and ahhs and reverence. The ultimate INTJ insult to an idea is to ignore it, because that means it's not even interesting enough to deconstruct.
12. Do not expect INTJs to care very much about how you view them. They already know that many people see them as arrogant bastards with a morbid sense of humor and they got used to it.
13. Telling them the obvious accomplishes nothing.

---

$updated from: How to handle an INTJ.htxt Fri 25 Apr 2008 16:35:16 thomasl$